Seeds

Scripture memory.  It's all over my radar right now.  I'm really not sure that the Lord could make it any more clear to me that I NEED it.  (Although, I have no doubt that he could if he wanted to, so that's not a challenge or anything.)  Thanks Mom, John Piper, and Seeds Family Worship.  A friend of mine and I recently went in together and bought the Seeds CDs.  If you haven't heard of them, they're great.  They're verses of scripture set to music that is aimed towards kids, but, as a parent, I like them too.  Best of all, the verses songs get stuck in my head.  Not a bad problem to have.

Especially when the song is "Phillipians 4:6-7".  "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."  Yeah.  Totally what I need to hear.  Over and over and over again in my head.  I am so ready for this little boy to be born.  I don't remember being this big or tired or unable to wear even most maternity clothes with Els.  But this is not my show and it's not about me.  So, I've been laying these worries over and over again at the feet of Jesus and asking for faith to trust that my discomfort is what's best for Miller.  Despite what I'm feeling, I know that he will be born precisely when he's supposed to.

Also, I'm nothing if not impatient, so waiting is always a good yet hard lesson for me.  There's much joy and excitement to be found in it.  Joy in the laughter, ever-growing vocabulary, and non-stop energy of my precious girl and excitement as I imagine how much more full life will be when there are two using the living room furniture as a jungle gym.  Or sitting in little boxes watching tv.

Fall, Where Are You?

I had the strangest dream last night.  We lived in the Southern United States and while we didn't get drastic season changes, it tended to turn cooler in September/October for autumn and then cold around the turn of the year.

Then I woke up to my reality.  That we live on the equator where it's still a blazing 90 degrees on October 27th.  Good thing Els' Halloween costume doesn't involve anything warm.

Go Dawgs!

Just in case you were wondering, getting a toddler and a bulldog to look at the camera at the same time may actually be impossible.  Aren't they cute, though?

I Look Forward To

Fall (Yes, I know it's October 22, but I live in the swamp and it's still in the high 70s and low 80s here.  No sweaters yet.)

Non-smelly newborn diapers (Even though I know that there will be MANY of them.)

Christmas music (T-8 days until we start playing it around here.)

Running (Don't even get me started.)

The occasional peppermint mocha (The closest 'bucks is 45 minutes away.)

Els' "I'm awake" chatter when nap is over

Hearing his key turn the lock at the end of the day

More Than I Deserve

So, I have to be real honest and tell you guys that I've been throwing a big pity party for myself around here lately.  You see, this week I'm 33 weeks pregnant with Miller and I kind of thought that most people in my life hadn't really noticed.  I've given myself little pep talks about how he's a second child and a lot of people don't have showers for second children, I just had a baby 19 months ago, we have most of what we need anyway, etc., etc.  The last thing I want to be is needy.  I guess it's the raging American in me that wants to pull myself up by my own bootstraps, thank-you-very-much.  But this is not how God intended for us to live together as believers, a point that He wanted to make very clear to me.

Everything changed yesterday when I walked into my good friend's house for our weekly lunch Bible study.  I hadn't noticed the extra cars parked around as I tried to carry the food I had made, Els' booster seat and bag, while also trying to corral her into the yard and out of the road.  And then it happened.  Everyone yelled "Surprise!"  It was not Bible study, it was a baby shower for Miller.  I cried.  Hard.  Automatically, I felt so foolish and selfish for having spent the time feeling left out and overlooked.  And I felt so blessed.  They had made all sorts of delicious food and invited some wonderful ladies that I haven't seen in a while.  It was wonderful to catch up with everyone and have all of our kids there together.  As I opened gifts, I threw out the tissue paper to all the toddlers and preschoolers and they had a ball throwing it around and ripping it to shreds.  What a perfect shower for a little boy!

Later in the afternoon, while Els napped, I sat on my bed and thanked God for His ever over-abundant provision for me.  I am overwhelmed at how marvelous His grace is to poor, petty me.  The shower yesterday was a not-so-subtle reminder that He does see me, listen to me, and pour blessings out on me even when I don't deserve them.  To the praise of His glorious Name!

Thank you, thank you sweet ladies for yesterday if you read this.  You can have no idea what an impact on my life you have made.

"There was life before my life.  There was provision before my need.  There was redemption before my sin.  For the sake of the world, I thank the Lord that the truth's not contingent on me."
-Derek Webb

Isn't It Love?

She may look like the spitting image of her father, but this girl is also 100% mine, declaring her love of cats on her clothing proudly.

How Can it Be?

Where has the time gone?  When did it change from June (the month it still currently is in my head) to OCTOBER?  While I'm quite excited that the temperature has dropped below the 90s (and even 80s!) here for a couple of days, it means that a precious little boy will be joining our family on the outside very soon.   This is partially due to the fact that I went to the doctor last week at 31 weeks and they don't want to see me back for 5 weeks.  5 weeks.  Oh government healthcare.  It's free, but sometimes you get just what you pay for.  Somedays, his arrival couldn't came soon enough and, at the same time, there are some moments where I feel like freaking out a bit.

My parents came this weekend and Dad helped B rearrange a bunch of furniture in the kids' (kids'!) rooms to get ready for Miller's arrival.  Now I have two rooms of the house that are in complete and utter disarray.  My task for the week:  create order from said chaos.  I know that I don't have to have Miller's nursery ready for him when he arrives, that he won't use it much for the first several weeks, but it will make me feel a lot better about things.  Especially with his due date smack dab in the middle of our two biggest holidays.  My sister is positive that I won't make it that long and while she was right about Els coming early, I am not getting my hopes up.  All I hope for is that he be born healthy and naturally.

So that's about it for now.  Things are entirely insane for B at work which means a lot of evening walks for Els and me while we wait for him to come home.  Our new double stroller is supposed to come today, so maybe we can give it a spin before it officially has two occupants.

Thank you all so much for your kind words and encouragement after my last post.  We don't live in a vacuum and it's so good to be reminded of that.