Even Me

Oh, I'm quickly becoming one of "those" bloggers.  You know, the ones who just post about once a month, but to tell you the absolute truth, I'd blog a whole lot more often if I could hold a coherent thought in my head for more than 20 seconds.  My mom says that you lose brain cells with each child, but I think this baby growing inside me is taking more than his/her fair share.  Maybe I'm growing some sort of child prodigy!

Anyway, I listen to a lot of John Piper these days.  If you don't know who he is, he is the pastor of a church in Minnesota who is without a doubt the most passionate person I've ever heard speak the Word of God.  You can find all of his sermons here for free.  I can't overstate how much this man loves the Word or how strongly God has used him in my life to get into the Word and love it.  So, long story short, here is the only thing I can think of to write today.

I am the worst sort of person.  Now, real quick, before you start thinking "Oh, no you're not" or, "she's just fishing for complements, hear me out.  I carry guilt about a whole host of things.  Mainly the fact that I have a master's degree that we're still paying off, I've never used it.  I am secretly proud about so much and I have a growing fear that I've walked around for most of my life like the emperor with my nose stuck in the air and no clue that I'm actually naked.  If you talk to me about faith, I will tell you about how the free grace of God has utterly changed my life, yet, I'm still so judgmental. Every Sunday during the corporate silent confession of sin, I confess the same sins over and over again.

But this is not the end of the story.  You see, the God of the universe sent his only son to live a perfect life, die, and rise again so that I can know Him.  Me.  The judgmental, prideful, slothful, guilty, scared of everything woman who walks around trying so hard to look put together.  Even me.  Don't let my futile attempts of cleaning my house and dressing myself and my family well fool you, I need Christ so desperately.  He alone is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.  He did all of the work, not so I wouldn't have to, but because I can't.  Christ covers my sin which allows me to enter into relationship with the God of the universe.  He is the only source of love that there is and it is only because of His massive love that I can love Him.  Or anyone else for the matter.

The really good news?  He's for you too.

"Why should I gain from His reward?  I cannot give an answer.  But this I know with all my heart, His wounds have paid my ransom."-Stuart Townsend