Epiphany

I remember the first time I heard the word epiphany. Mr. Smi says it in the movie "Hook," and though I had no idea what it meant the first time I heard it, I thought "epiphany" was the most beautiful word that had ever met my ears.

But I digress.

I had one such epiphany the other night as we were putting Els to bed. We do the same thing every night. B was laying on the floor surrounded by Rumor and Charlie, and I was in the glider, rocking Els to sleep (yes, I still do that-I love it!) when the thought occurred to me, "There's no place I'd rather be."

Now, y'all endure enough angst from me about belonging and loneliness and missing home to know that this was huge in my life. To God be the glory-He redeems all things! Even weeks that B works long hours and we're nap training and all three exhausted. What joy He can surprise us with!

"Sometimes a light surprises the Christian while he sings;
It is the Lord, who rises with healing in His wings:
When comforts are declining, He grants the soul again
A season of clear shining to cheer it after the rain."
-William Cowper

Shout-out

Thanks to Jana for help with the new header. Not only did she take the picture, she showed this computer-illiterate mama how to make said picture into a header.

Click on over to see more of her amazing photos!

Pray for Piper

A sweet family that we know from "home" found out this week that their 2-month-old granddaughter, Piper, has leukemia. It is so sad, but they are choosing to be hopeful from what I have heard. Please pray for this family and Piper's doctors at Scottish Rite.

You can follow their blog here.

P.S. Thanks for all of your words of encouragement lately. I feel truly loved and blessed!

Grace's Life is a Fashion Show

Today was Mom's day to read to Grace's 1st grade class at school. They have been spending time this week picking out the book for Mom to read and collecting various items for Grace to take for show and tell.

Grace rides with their neighbors to school because the mom is the school counselor and the daughter is Grace's often-time partner in dressing-up-and-riding-large-stuffed-horses-around. So, every morning Mom throws something on and walks Grace to the end of the driveway to meet the neighbors. In anticipation of the big show and tell today, Grace was already a little miffed at Mom for not letting her bring Todo, their dog, to school when she looked up at jeans and t-shirt clad Mom and said, "You're not wearing that to my school are you?"

First grade, people. I have a feeling that Dad's credit card needs to gird it's loins before this girl hits middle school.

28

Happy Birthday Babe! Love you forever!

The Night Before

In 2001, they still put phone lines into on-campus apartments. It was just before everyone relied primarily on cell phones and land lines went the way of the dodo bird. That year was my sophomore year at Wingate University and I lived with three other girls in an apartment where we each had a tiny room with shared common areas. We also each had our own land lines, since, like I said earlier, our cell phones were still primarily "for emergencies." We also each had answering machines that were entire separate entities from our phones.

On the night of September 10, 2001, my roommates and I decided to do funny songs on each others' answering machines as the greetings. I did an inspiring version of "Kiss the Girl" from The Little Mermaid on my roommate Natalie's machine. Another roommate, Faith, penned an original rap entitled, "Where Kel? I don't know!" for my machine which finished with the mad beat-box skills of four 20-year-old white girls. Sadly, I don't remember the other two, but we had a great time together and laughed a whole lot. It was what we called a "family night."

We had no idea that the world was about to change forever.

Why I'm Infrequent

I just got out of a good shower. Man, it feels good to be clean, especially after, and I'm gonna be real honest here, it's been a few days since the last one. I say all this because I sometimes strangely get a lot of clarity in the shower. My posts have been infrequent lately, I know. I feel like there's nothing to blog about, and when I sit down to write, I end up writing the same thing over and over again. They're all about how I'm lonely, but blessed, and homesick yet home.

I realized that I try and try to make friends, but I hate to be vulnerable, so I put up my mask with everyone, and so there hasn't been any real spark of friendship with anyone here. So, I feel alone. And I wallow. Then I write the same blog post (usually on Tuesday) and erase it.

I've decided to try to be vulnerable in hopes of making a good friend. Starting tomorrow. (No, I'm not procrastinating, I just don't call people with kids after nine because I know that we get irritated if someone randomly calls us at that time.) I decided to put this resolution in writing so that maybe I won't chicken out tomorrow.

As always, thanks for bearing with me through this. God is good through all of my struggling. I know He has a reason for this lonely period. I know he knows what it is to be lonely and that's comforting.

"Guide me, O Thou great Jehovah,
Pilgrim through this barren land.
I am weak, but Thou art mighty;
Hold me with Thy powerful hand.
Bread of Heaven, Feed me til I want no more." -William Williams

Old Feet, New Feet

I am

Eating frozen thin mints

Drinking Celestial Seasons "Sleepytime" (which we refer to as "bear tea" because of the logo)

Happy that Els was in bed BEFORE 9pm

Watching a re-run of Criminal Minds

Sore from a good run with a new friend today

Really engrossed in reading When a Crocodile Eats the Sun

Excited about visiting friends this weekend

Sitting next to my best friend